Lead by Following: Transformative Leadership Strategies
Heather McGonigal and Barbara Schindler open this conversation with an idea that sounds backwards until you sit with it. Real authority, the kind that actually builds team performance, comes from following your team instead of running ahead of them. When you hold decision-making power on a project, in a department, or across an entire company, the instinct to speak first and set direction fires almost automatically. This episode pulls that instinct apart and hands you something better to do instead.
Barbara redefines active listening here, and it is not staying quiet. It is the deliberate work of drawing ideas out of people who have learned to let the leader go first. She walks through the exact trap that catches most leaders: a quiet meeting gets read as "nobody has anything to say," when really the team has learned that speaking up doesn't change what happens next. The fix is not waiting longer. It is sharing an unfinished thought out loud on purpose, so the room sees that half-formed ideas are actually welcome.
Heather brings in leadership reputation, the version of you that gets built in ordinary Slack messages and status updates just as much as in a crisis. She and Barbara talk through why the hardest moments, not the easy ones, are what people remember about working with you. Getting curious about your own stress patterns, whether you go quiet, get defensive, or push harder, gives you an actual chance to choose differently the next time pressure hits.
They close the conversation with something concrete. Pick one habit, one recurring meeting, and run a two to three week experiment leading by following before checking in on what shifted.
Key Takeaways
- Leading by following means the leader listens first and invites the team to shape the thinking before adding their own.
- Active listening is not passive. It means asking open questions that pull unfinished ideas into the open.
- Leadership reputation gets built in daily interactions and cemented in the hardest ones.
- Naming your own stress pattern gives you the chance to choose a different response before habit takes over.
Low-stakes brainstorming, on a topic with nothing riding on it, builds the muscle before you need it for the high-stakes decision.
Action Steps
- In your next team meeting, share a half-formed thought out loud instead of your full recommendation and ask the room to build on it.
- Set up one brainstorming session this month where nobody is obligated to act on anything that gets said.
After your next difficult interaction, write down how you actually responded under pressure and how you want to respond next time.
Questions to Reflect On
- When I walk into a meeting, am I setting my team up to speak first, or am I taking that space by default?
- What does my team's silence actually mean, and have I ever checked?
What is my go-to habit under pressure, and is it the reputation I want to be known for?
Want to talk through how this applies to your team? Book a complimentary coffee chat: https://www.empoweringleadershipteams.com/coffeechat
About the Hosts: Coach Heather and Coach Barbara are the lead Executive Coaches of Empowering Leadership Teams. They specialize in helping entrepreneurial businesses and their teams meet the moment and become the most empowered they can be to work together and achieve optimal results. With deep expertise in leadership development, team dynamics, and navigating organizational transition, they bring practical, actionable wisdom to leaders facing the challenges of today's rapidly changing business environment.
Weekly Leadership With a Twist Newsletter:
https://www.empoweringleadershipteams.com/huddle-subscribe
Subscribe & Review: If you found value in this episode, please subscribe to our podcast and leave us a review. Your feedback helps us create content that serves entrepreneurial leaders like you, and it helps other leaders discover these conversations.
Questions or topics you'd like us to address in future episodes? Send us a message at or leave a comment on our latest post.
Cheering You On!
